What She’s Really Thinking

FYI: “What She’s Really Thinking” will be a regular feature here at Roissy in DC. Content may vary.

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Mono Game

Zeets the Throwback Barbarian told me about a situation he had with his date.
Zeets: So the date is going well…
Me: Some makeouts?
Zeets: We were about to kiss but then I stopped her and told her I had mono and I didn’t want her to catch it. I said it should only be one more week then we [...]

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I’ve Seen The Error Of My Ways

I’m a sensitive man, and some of my reader’s comments expressing their hurt and frustration with my writings have bothered me. After a bit of sorrowful reflection, I decided to turn my back on the anger and evil in my heart and open myself to a deeper understanding and wisdom.
Here is a video response to [...]

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Visualizing Beta Part 2

In the last installment of visualizing beta, I ridiculed discussed in an even tone the photo of a lesser beta who wasn’t comfortable enough to drape his arm like a normal human male across the shoulders of an attractive girl. His tragic case was an obvious one. Virginal nerds, like fat chicks, can be spotted from [...]

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May 2008 Comment Winner

For the second time in a row* (there was no April comment winner because all the comments in April sucked) droll and deadpan blogfly Gannon takes home the prize with his comment on my post Overheard In DC:
The real culprit is that women’s extended adolescence increases each year. Age of first marriage delys itself more [...]

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Wild Monkey Man Beast Caught On Film!

How Zeets the Throwback Barbarian was able to hold the camera steady when encountering this mysterious and frightening creature deep in the woods is a testament to his nipples of drop-forged steel. You never saw that much hard nipple on a man.
I went on a hike trying to escape civilization and its discontents for a [...]

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Worst Costume Ever

There has been a recent springtime flurry of activity for my Halloween-themed post “Best Costume Ever“, so I figured this is a good time to introduce the world to its evil twin, the Worst Costume Ever:

The horror…

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Shit Stains After Sex

A reader wrote me asking for advice about a delicate situation. He asked me in private but since I think this is an important issue that all guys should know about (and that the email was probably a joke), I’ve posted it here and removed all identifying information.
yo roissy,
ive been reading your blog for a while [...]

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Funny ‘Cause It’s (Kinda) True

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Dancing Herb Friday

I fulfilled my white person obligation and went to an 80s night. 80s music is catchy and danceable; it practically coaxes the rhythm out of you. The girls were mostly mid 20s to mid 30s and were very approachable. When women reach a certain age they stop sitting in a tight circle with their backs to [...]

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